I told my wife a few weeks ago that I thought watching and taking care of children was way harder than being a pastor. She then told me it was the nicest thing I had ever said to her.
I wasn’t actually trying to get points mit my frau. I really think that’s true. Certainly some of the time, maybe even most of the time.
When I was at the height (depth?) of my sickness, it was our children that I couldn’t handle more than anything else. I’ve blogged a few times about my travails with shut-ins, but really it is children that require a lot more emotional energy, I think.
I bring this up because today I watched our kids. All of them, for about 4 hours. I know, that doesn’t sound like much. Some of them were napping for part of the time, and they were all there and full bore for a little more than an hour. The thing is, I’m not certain I have watched all of our kids on my own since I came off of disability. Maybe I have. But I was glad to be able to do it and not have a complete meltdown in the process.
I love our children. That isn’t the issue. The issue is one of responsibility, stimulation, and the ability to process and do on-the-spot problem solving. None of these things really go well with sufferers of depression. So I counted today a great victory. Yes, it was just four hours. Yes, my saintly wife does it for about 20 hours a day every day. I don’t know how she does it. But today, I’ll rejoice in what healing God grants, and prays that it may continue.
Mothers of the world, I salute you.